2019 in Review

This will be my fifth year in a row doing these, so you can also read about 201520162017, or 2018 if so desired. They are inspired by Tilde, who has taught me that it can be a Good Thing to remember what the last year has been like. Many of the headers in this post are based on my 2019 goals.

The phrase for this year was building the foundations, as I had just made space for them. I feel like I solidly did this.

Stated Goals

Maintain a healthy routine for myself.

So I didn’t really talk about physical fitness last year, but I’ve kept up a solid routine of climbing, yoga, bicycling, strength training, and (for awhile there) boxing. I don’t work evenings, weekends, or holidays. I took most of the PTO available to me this year. With growing regularity I read books and drink tea instead of drinking. I went to PT and massage therapy when I injured myself. I take my meds and my vitamins regularly. I go to bed around 9p and wake up around 5:30 every day. My baseline is hecka solid.

Figure out more future things with Reed & something that brings hope.

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So uh. We got married. One of the best choices I’ve yet made in my life. Having Reed in my corner makes life more joyful, interested, and stable. He also challenges me to be better, and brings a perspective that brings hope to my brain (and by proxy, the people around me).

Set a metric and improve that metric at work.

Set metrics around time to onboard new Trussels, how many internal projects I was managing (work in progress), and how many new leaders I could uplift with those internal projects. Also implemented surveys around D&I and sense of belonging. Saw major gains in onboarding and developing leadership, small gains in WIP and belonging, and it’s still too soon to tell for D&I.

Try out sparring.

Because I sometimes do security at protests, I wanted to know how I reacted to getting punched. So I took up boxing. There was a point this year where I was training for boxing 5 days a week – in class, at home, and in private lessons. I love Four Elements Fitness and the science of boxing. Highly recommend. But when it came time to spar, I found that I have a really hard time hitting people (even consenting friends) in the face. I’m still not sure if boxing has a role in my life, but my body was at its happiest when I was in this groove this year.

Continue to meet my savings goals and investing in my communities.

I’ve been doing well at this, especially with the guidance of Ride Free Fearless Money, a fantastic person who does consulting and education around finances for anticapitalists.

Contribute to events as support, not as main organizer.

I’ve gone on a lot of bicycle rides that I didn’t organize, from friend rides in the Bay to organized rides with over 100 people to bicycling in the wooded mountains near Susanville. I also participated in a leadership program put on by Rise Together Bay Area without running any part of it (and it was a joy, they really have their shit together)!  And for Priceless, I contributed on tickets and on-site setup, but wasn’t a core organizer! I’m very proud of myself.

Something that brings joy.

I officiated Matt and Jenn’s wedding in Bloomington, Indiana. This was such a joy. They’re excellent humans with other excellent humans in their lives, and to be able to commemorate that through ritual was just dandy.


Reed and I also got a cat. After 7ish years without a pet, this has been baller. He’s sleeping on my lap right now.

Something that feels selfish.

Got my eyes lasered. This was an experience. I did PRK rather than any other form because I might get hit in the eye repeatedly at some point at a protest or something, and I don’t want my cornea to slide off my face. But that also meant a week of pain and blindness, followed by a month of blurry vision and dry eyes, and now perfect vision. It’s hard to describe what a great present perfect vision is. I don’t have to be constantly worried about being stranded somewhere if something happens to my glasses. They’re not always coming down my nose during physical activity. I wouldn’t be blind in an earthquake. I feel grateful every day that I did this for myself.

Previous years’ unmet goals that were met this year

Continue reducing my intoxicant consumption

2019 has been a good year. I’ve found healthier habits for coping with things, plus I have a solid enough baseline that I have available self control even when I’m still having a rough time. I’d proud of myself for treating myself better.

Bicycle further than I walk (without any drastic reduction in walking)

This is bananas, y’all. Something just clicked for me this year with bicycles. Going on long rides while listening to audiobooks on bone-conduction headphones is now my absolute favorite thing. To the point that I rode 2,500 miles this year, including a few populaires (100k), a century (100 miles), and a 200k Brevet. I walked 1,350 miles.

Unmet stated goal

Complete 4 cross-stitch projects.

I finished two, and then I started on that was too big and that I didn’t have the right equipment for. Instead of course correcting I plowed ahead and burned myself out on it.

Other things

Got another tattoo


After last year’s “first last tattoo,” I kept struggling with some personal things. This one a tribute to liminal space. Reed and I are going to try to gestate, and there’s no way to know if it’ll work or not, so this is a time of liminality, of between-ness. I love working with Santa Perpetua so much — as always, I waxed poetic to her about my existential angst and she put it as art on my body so I can carry it with me.

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Once more, this nice spartan lady came from The Estates, put up with two days in a row of my unfriendly needle and crazy rambling, to have in the end my artwork on her skin. I feel blessed to have such awesome people as clients. So, for this one, “Burn your ship” or “Swim out of the fish bowl”… Whichever you like! ;D WWW.SANTAPERPETUATATTOO.COM #santaperpetua #watercolortattoo #brighton #london #uk #avantgardetattoo #graphicarttattoo #eclectictattoo #contemporarytattooing #conceptualtattoo #thebesttattooartists #radtattoos #tattoo #art #ink #skin #abstracttattoo #organizedchaostattoo #toptattooartist #tattoolifegallery #freehandtattoo #swimoutofthefishbowl #onlywatercolor #burnyourship #detailstattoo

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Was intentional about my relationships

Have continued to invest more in a smaller set of friendships and romantic relationships. Have also decided (with the other person) that some just weren’t working out. One of the things about poly is that it allows relationships to draaaaaagggg on for a long time without closing things up that should be closed. I’m proud of us for not following that pattern, as hard as it can be in the moment.

Travel & Culture

  • Went to Indonesia for our honeymoon. Got over my fish phobia, tried out snorkeling, scuba, and free diving for the first times. Pet lots of cats, read lots of books, and just chilled the fuck out for two weeks. Also went on a mad dash for Dim Sum in Hong Kong on a layover that was just long enough on the way back.
  • We also went to France. Bicycled the Burgandy canal, ate at a 3-star Michelin restaurant, and found out that Paris truly is closed in the month of August.
  • Took a class on Neo Futurism. When I was doing crisis response, I stopped telling stories because everything I said seemed like one-upmanship. So I took a class on non-illusory theater from the SF Neo-Futurists to learn to tell stories again.
  • Reed and I have maintained a membership at a local theater and see shows there about once a month. Sometimes they’re exceptional and sometimes they’re terrible, but it feels nice to support Teh Arts.
  • Went to Desert X with friends. The art wasn’t the best I’ve ever seen, but it sure was a blast to go on a roadtrip with this crew.
  • Took other people to see The Jungle. I was so impacted by seeing The Jungle in NYC in 2018 that I made a point to bring some friends to see it when it came to SF. We then all sat together, mostly in silence, in a sushi place nearby while we processed our Feelings.
  • We went to Chicago to see one of Reed’s favorite musicals, Next to Normal. It was a fantastic piece of theater, put on humbly but well.

All this while still managing to decrease my overall speed – 6mph constant (the lowest it’s ever been since starting to track!), with 4 months with no flights at all.

2020

So now we’re on the cusp of 2020, and I should think about what that means for me.

  • Devise new ways to connect with my crew (and do so).
  • I dunno, maybe gestate? O_o
  • Take care of myself as best I can in light of potential gestation.
  • Bring passion back to my work.
  • Pick up ONE side project.

My phrase for 2020 will be welcoming others.