I set out to write one blog post a month about something that brought me joy. This one is a few days late, but that’s ok, I’m not perfect.

After Reed and I had been living together for awhile, with the intention of feeling each other out before marriage (his idea) and kid(s) (my idea), I proposed we get cats. Reed wanted to think about it and research. Months passed. I said, no maybe you don’t understand, we are now getting cats. He acquiesced.

We spent all day at the animal shelter meeting pair bonded kitties. It was important to me to get a set of cats so they could keep each other company and be happier. Also, they have a harder time finding homes. I fell in love with a few, Reed didn’t really click with any. As the shelter was closing down, the staff said it was clear we weren’t done looking and recommended we go to a nearby Pet Food Express that hosted some shelter cats, as they were open for another hour or two. So we went. No pair bonded kitties. But Reed immediately noticed and fawned over a little white cat (not a kitten, but not fully a cat yet either) with heterochromia. Reed scooped the cat up. The cat purred a whole lot. Reed held him like a baby. He purred even more. I tried to pet him. He bit me. Reed pleaded with me to take home a single cat that didn’t like me. The staff were so excited to find him a home that they waived all fees. And that’s how we got North.

North proved to be highly trainable, and Reed is also excellent at training animals. He would come to where you tapped. He would do high fives. But we couldn’t get him to stop biting. Finally, one day, I suggested that he was unhappy and lonely and needed a friend. Also, I wanted a cat (Reed was by far North’s favorite. He would tolerate me when Reed wasn’t around, but I wasn’t getting the kitty cuddles I craved). Reed was willing to try, so back to the shelter we went. There were some cats that were pretty ok, but none that we were both clicking with.

Now here is a major difference between Reed and me. Reed has HUGE amplitudes of emotion. He gets SO excited about things, and he is SO disappointed if something doesn’t go according to plan. And after he feels things, he moves on. And I have lower amplitude of deep emotions that don’t get very big but still exist. In this circumstance, that meant that any cat I was lukewarm on was about as much as I was going to get into it, and Reed either LOVED the cat and would end up with two cats at home, or HATED the cat and didn’t want to take it home. When I noticed this mismatch and its consequences, we sat down in the lobby and discussed, and ended up taking home a small sickly kitten. Reed named him Doc Holiday for his dark brown coat.

We tried to keep them separated, but North immediately wanted to play (gently) with the little cat. He immediately stopped biting humans (he used to run into a room, jump to your hand to bite it, and then run back out. Now we see he was probably trying to get us to play with him). Holiday dealt with a series of health issues, some of which transferred to North. But we got through it, and they became good buddies. Holiday was a nervous wreck for the first 3ish years we had him, and then finally grew to trust a predictable food source and a solid play and care routine. Like, he used to get so anxious he’d form crystals in his bladder, get blockages, and have to go to the emergency vet. But he’s very charismatic in a long play kind of way.

Holiday sleeps on my bed, and North cuddles Reed in the mornings and evenings, and both cats love it when Reed and I share a bed. They’ve both turned into lap cats and begrudgingly share a lap when Reed and I are not both sitting down. They both come to say hi to visitors now, although they’re not the most gregarious with new folks. We play with them or take them outside (supervised!) 15 minutes before feeding them in puzzle balls every morning and evening, and it seems to work really well for their dispositions and health. We treat them with respect and care, and as more than ornamental fish in our house. And they meet us in kind with affection and play.

They both bring me so much joy, and I’m so grateful we get to help them have happy lives. I love that they have specific ways they like to get pet. I love that they suit us so well, and that we’re able to provide them happy lives.