You Know You’re From Indiana When…
You drive for three hours and the scenery outside doesn’t change.
There’s three feet of snow on the ground and school is still in session.
You only go to the mall once a year ’cause it takes too long to get there.
While driving all you see is corn.
People still have Christmas decorations up at Easter.
You start saying to yourself “More than corn in Indiana my butt.”
Anyone with a cell phone looks out of place.
Walking through Wal-Mart with two carts full of kids is normal.
Wnyone with a tan is rich.
The hip hang-out place is McDonald’s.
There really is more than corn in Indiana. There’s soybeans, too.
When you plan an orgy and a Euchre game breaks out.
A restaurant has an invisible wall in the non-smoking section and you believe it works.
Speeding consists of 2 miles over the speed limit.
You think you don’t have to use a turn signal on your car because you don’t use it on your tractor.
You build your dream house on a cornfield, and you considered it posh.
You warsh your clothes and you think George Warshington was the first president.
You’re proud to be called a Hoosier, even if you don’t know what one is.
You have no problem spelling or pronouncing “Terre Haute”
Detassling was your first job. Bailing hay, your second.
You can stack hay, swim in the pond to clean off, and then have the strength to play a couple of games of hoops all in the same day.
You say things like “catty-wumpus” and “kitty-corner”.
You own a dirtbike or a ATV.
You live in a city … and there’s a cornfield in your backyard.
High school basketball game draws a bigger crowd on the weekend nights than movie theaters.
You can see at least 2 basketball hoops from your yard.
You can name every one of Bob Knight’s “exploits” over the last few years.
You shop at Marsh.
Damon Bailey was your childhood hero.
The biggest question of your youth was “IU or Purdue?”
Indianapolis is the “big city”.
“Getting caught by a train” is a legitimate excuse for being late to school.
People at your high school chewed tobacco.
Everyone knows who the town cop is, where he lives, and whether he is at home or on duty.
You actually know what the CART vs IRL debate is about and have taken a side.
To you, a raccoon is simply a “coon”.
The vehicle of choice in your area is not a car, but a pickup.
Someone you know is BIG John Mellencamp fan.
You’ve been to the Covered Bridge Festival.
To you, a tenderloin is not an expensive cut of beef, but a big, salty, breaded piece of pork served on a bun with pickles.
You call a green bell pepper a “mango”.
Sometimes, you call the toilet the “commode” or the “stool”.
In the fall, one of your favorite pranks was corning cars.
You know what FFA and 4H stand for.
You know what chip-and-seal is, and your high school was located on just such a road.
You go the county fair every night of it’s week-long duration.
You can say “French Lick” without laughing out loud.
There’s actually a college near you named “Ball State.”
The last “g” is silent in any word ending in “ing.”
You think the state Bird is Larry.
You know at least 2 people who have hit a deer in the last year.
60* is quite warm, and -10* is getting cold.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Indiana.
That reminds me… the other day, Corey said something about hating the snow and cold, but how winter would be done soon. All I could do was laugh.