Autonomy and the Left

I’m pretty clearly a Leftist. However, the Left has one major bone to pick with it — otherwise I’m just a “big tent” person who doesn’t mind so much what values any given person adheres to. And that has to do with autonomy.

So much of the messaging of the Left over my lifetime has been about how poverty, inequality, etc are the system’s fault. And while this is a powerful and necessary argument to, say, explore how an entire system can be racist without individuals being bigoted themselves, it also strips away people’s sense of purpose and power.

When I was regularly in Tanzania, I saw a lot of poor people who had just accepted that they were poor. Social mobility in America is about as viable as in Tanzania, but people here think of their status in the hierarchy as a result of their personal actions, not their lot in life. Both of these models come at a cost, and also have benefits.

Here is the thing: the system is what we make of it. It is made of us. And so when we abscond responsibility and say that what we face is the system’s fault, we also accept what we have been offered. And I refuse to believe this is good enough. The laws and rules of humans are human-made, and we can change them. Does it take energy? Yes! Does it come at a cost? Yes! But should we do it anyway? I sure as shit am not happy with where we are now, how about you?

Hierarchies and second puberty

I’ve been getting feedback from those in a position to do so that I’ve turned into a bit of an asshole. I explored some of the contributions to this personality shift a bit ago, but I didn’t actually address the behavior.

I didn’t address the behavior because I wanted to know what it was like to take up space in the world, to not be full of crippling doubt at every moment, and to trust in the strength of others.

I now know what that’s like, but I don’t have the limited grace and abundant guidance we give pubescent boys as they learn how to navigate the world when full of certainty, rage, and energy. I am mid-stage career with a kindergartener and a community built around empathy, connection, and listening. So while a few folks closest to me have asserted new boundaries and talked to me about what it is to be a Good Man (which I am also not interested in being, but I am interested in how they approach things to integrate it), I have run roughshod around those who perceive me as having some sort of power over them.

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